Maturity is a major focus of mine. I am far too impatient to be young; I have older siblings to thank for that. The idea of growing up is so intriguing to me, because it has nothing to do with age. Up until September of this year I have been living in a house with my family. This is an adequate practice-step to take in learning how to grow. You are taught to handle miniscule situations sooner, rather than later, so that in the future, they can be avoided. Moving away is enormous leap to adulthood, and residence is a great initiation in learning how to advance to that next level.
Living at home all my life has taught me to live by my mother’s standards of cleanliness (within reason…). This of course only came into effect after I moved to Edmonton from Saskatoon. This mannerism of hers has absorbed into my subconscious, and surprisingly, I actually enjoy cleaning my new place. While living back at home, I almost always had clothes on the floor, and “junk,” as she so kindly generalizes, scattered about the house. It’s a responsibility issue, I suppose. While living under her roof, I felt threatened by power. In a way, I retaliated with a messy room; to challenge and dominate with the hopes of becoming the boss of my room. But here at residence I find that if my room is the slightest bit unorganized, I am ashamed of myself. If I have no homework or a spare hour from practicing, you can bet I’ll be cleaning or doing dishes.
One of the things I miss most about living at home with my family, other than my dog, is the food. Supper with my mother is always extreme. When you’ve had your fill, she somehow manages to stuff two more courses in you. I realize now just how much I took her cooking for granted. “Some people live to eat, others eat to live,” she used to say. I used to love eating when she cooked. Now that I have moved to Edmonton, I changed from having a healthy diet to binging on fast food for weeks. It’s not that I don’t like to eat anymore, but too much of one thing gets boring. When I became tired with fast food, I progressed (or demoted) to pastas and other simple “quick fix” meals. As of yet, I don’t think I have had one meal with all the proper nutrients that make up the food groups. Even so, I think I am still eating healthier than some of my peers.
Another dilemma I am faced with is the concept of money. Sure, I have had money before, and I have had to ration it too. But this is a complication that is new to me. I have to rely on student loans in order to pay for bus passes, food, and little odds and ends that are insignificant but still a necessity for comfortable living. Generally, when I had money in Saskatoon, I would spend it without careful consideration. Since I have moved here my spending money has completely vanished. I am worried about next month’s budgeting for food alone. I know that if I ever have a problem with money, my parents can help me. But I don’t want to ask for money unless I am desperate for it. I am far too proud, and stubborn, to ask for help, especially financially. It makes living away a little tougher, but it is a good way to learn to take better care of my money.
I love my privacy, and little annoyances can be a problem for me. At home, I know that if I have a problem, they are disagreements that have reasonably easy solutions. Here in residence I have a roommate. We share a kitchen and bathroom, and that is supposed to be it; however, we have a few misunderstandings. He has no respect for my privacy or belongings. I have tried to handle the situation in a mature fashion, but he is such a delinquent that there is no use for reasoning. I will try to have to think of a new approach to deal with him.
I realize that I tend to take things for granted, and I complain about the little grievances too often. But even though there are more negative things listed about living in residence, the fact is, I am learning that if I want to be a responsible adult, I had better deal on my own terms with any sort situation. It’s time to grow up.